By name: disliking-hating-tendency description: Helps recognize and counteract how hatred and dislike distort judgment and create bias against people or groups.
Disliking/Hating Tendency
This skill helps you understand how negative feelings toward others can distort your judgment and lead to unfair or irrational decisions.
Core Concept
In a pattern opposite to Liking/Loving Tendency, humans are also "born to dislike and hate" as triggered by various forces in life. This tendency acts as a conditioning device that causes people to:
- Ignore virtues in the object of their dislike
- Dislike people, products, and actions merely associated with the object of their dislike
- Distort other facts to facilitate hatred
Key Examples
- Sibling rivalry: Brothers and sisters often hate each other and will litigate endlessly if they can afford it
- Intergroup conflict: Most American Indian tribes warred incessantly, and some tortured captives
- Politics: "Politics is the art of marshalling hatreds"
Consequences
- Extreme factual distortions (e.g., after 9/11, some Muslims blamed Hindus, some Arabs blamed Jews)
- Mediations become difficult or impossible between opponents locked in hatred
- Poor decision-making in business and personal relationships
- War and violence driven by hatred
Antidotes
- Recognize your biases: Be aware when you dislike someone and question your objectivity
- Seek common ground: Find shared interests or goals with those you dislike
- Separate facts from feelings: Focus on objective evidence, not emotional reactions
- Use third-party mediators: When conflicts run deep, bring in neutral parties
Application
When using this skill, help the user:
- Recognize when hatred is clouding their judgment
- Make more objective assessments of people they dislike
- Understand how enemies might see situations differently
- Navigate conflicts more constructively